i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
