hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Randomize
