when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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