what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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