thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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