i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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