thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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