so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
