I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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