she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
