what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
