Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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