dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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