Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
