so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize