Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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