We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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