i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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