Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize
