absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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