I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
