best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
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