I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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