When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
