oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
