trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
did i just pee glitter
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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