I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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