who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
