new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize
