I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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