We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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