Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize