She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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