I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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