he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize