Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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