All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
