ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Randomize
