The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
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