brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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