Pregnant stripper...not hot.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Randomize
