I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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