Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
