the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
