It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
