Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
