I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize