I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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