It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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