weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Randomize
