that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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